The Anti-Valentine’s Playlist

If February 13 fell on a Friday every year, it would always be the best time to hate on Valentine’s Day. Not everyone’s looking forward to the day of hearts and roses and mushy everything, and I sympathize with all of the bitter souls out there. You ask, looking like the crazy end-of-the-world guy, “Why should we celebrate it? Why does this day even exist? Why do people love? WHY DOESN’T ANYONE LOVE ME?!!!

So from the top of my head, I listed down songs on my iPod that would suit your pre-Valentine’s angst. Enjoy the heart-wrenching music, one and all!

1. Nazareth, Love Hurts

Plain, simple, and classic. A must for every anti-Valentine’s playlist.

2. Eamon, F*ck It

Who could forget this gem of a song? Blast this in your car and casually pass by your ex wherever they may be. Make sure to slow down when the song reaches the last lines at the end of the chorus to drive home your point.

3. N’Sync, I Drive Myself Crazy

Don’t you just hate it when the guilt-trip is too much for you to handle that you end up in a mental hospital? Me too.

4. Bon Jovi, Always

One of my all-time favorite love songs. A good song to listen to but a better one to sing along to. Get drunk with your buddies and karaoke the heck out of this song. It’ll make you feel better and piss everyone else off.

5. The Killers, Mr. Brightside

Why are you watching the love of your life get it on with someone else? Stop looking, you masochist! Save yourself!

6. Marion Raven, Break You

Boyfriend cheats on you? Don’t just break his stuff. Break him too.

7. The Beatles, Oh! Darling

When The Beatles tells you that they ain’t gonna hurt you, you better believe. Mystery girl, why did you break The Beatles’ heart? Check out the version from the Across the Universe soundtrack for some duet action.

8. Jesse McCartney, Just So You Know

For that one person you can’t get over no matter how hard you try.

9. The Rascal Flatts, What Hurts The Most

WARNING: This song is 100++ on the heartbreak meter. The music video is even more heartbreaking. Only listen to this song when you need a good cry after a really bad break-up. Don’t hurt yourself. Please.

10. Paramore, Stay Away

I’m not really sure if this song was recorded by Paramore or another band with Hayley Williams on vocals but that’s not the point! The point is, this is a perfect song for that lying bastard you loathe and you wished their lies would come to life and eat them whole. Then regurgitate them because they’re full of nothing but trans fat.

11. Lana Del Rey, She’s Not Me

Because you’re the baddest b*tch there ever was and you won’t let him forget it.

12. Justin Timberlake, What Goes Around Comes Around

Moral lesson: Karma’s gonna get ya. Check out Alesana’s cover of this song if you’re feeling extra angsty.

13. Vertical Horizon, Best I Ever Had

Hey, it’s alright. You’ll find someone else.

You can download all of these songs legally or illegally! (PS: I don’t tolerate piracy but it’s a reality that’s very apparent.)

HAPPY (or not so happy) VALENTINE’S DAY!

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